FUCKING PISSED*

*originally from LJ

the day started out great... but now all i want to do is lay down and stare at the ceiling in self pity or maybe rip someone's head off

at first i couldnt figure out why i was angry, eventually i did, but since that revelation i've added another reason for my mood

1 - i fucking hate moving. i hate packing. i hate unpacking. worse than packing or unpacking, is doing it alone for 3+ hours in a quiet apartment with no one and nothing around to entertain/help/distract you. Mind you I haven't unpacked yet, but the thought of doing it is making me very stressed.

2 - i need friends. i need a life. i depend on alex too much for my entertainment. tonight he wanted to play a new game he bought, which he is perfectly entitled to do, but the question remains: what the fuck do i do? i've been bouncing off walls coming up with very temporary solutions to waste 10 minutes at a time for the last 4 hours. I've updated websites, listserves, sent emails, taken half a biology GRE, showered, cut my toe nails, changed twice, and watched the brita pitcher filter for 5 minutes. i need a life of my own. this is pathetic. it is exactly what i feared would happen if i were ever in a great relationship. the relationship has turned into an entity that has devoured my life. it's not alex's fault, but since he's the only one around, i end up taking it out on him. arg.

just wanna cry :(